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Making babies makes you smarter

Want to get smarter? Have a kid.

The human brain makes new cells constantly over a lifetime, but the cells are most likely to survive and flourish when challenged with emotional and novel experiences. Scientists now say that parenthood provides the perfect "revolution for the brain."

After all, what could be more challenging than teaching a person to use the toilet? Or figuring out which cry means "I'm hungry?" Or coming up with new and different ways to disguise green vegetables?

Leading neuroscientists across the country are studying the ways that parenthood -- and, in particular, motherhood -- strengthens our mental abilities. One study showed that mother lab rats, like working mothers, excel at time management and efficiency, racing through mazes to get back to their babies as quickly as possible. Other research revealed that hormones created by labor and breastfeeding are linked to the ability to learn.

Katherine Ellison explores this concept in her book, The Mommy Brain. I heard Ellison talk about the mental gymnastics required by motherhood on my local pubic radio station, as I drove home from a late-night run to the drugstore for gas drops to administer to my newborn.

I laughed out loud when she said the mommy brain is a smarter brain, but then I realized just how often I apply complex problem solving skills in my job as a work-at-home mom. Dads aren't exactly slouches in this department, either. Keeping these kids alive is a lot of work, y'all.

Did parenthood make you smarter? Do you agree with Ellison, or is it just more mother-knows-best propaganda?

John McCain bails on meeting with Jenny McCarthy

Presidential nominee John McCain allegedly had a date set with actress Jenny McCarthy. The topic of their discussion? Not love but, rather autism, and specifically the link between the condition and the use of thimerosal in the vaccines McCarthy believes cause autism.

McCarthy was eager to meet with McCain after learning he believes there may be a link as well, and apparently flew herself out for a meeting with the Republican senator to try to make autism a major part of the presidential campaign.

According to reports, however, McCain backed out after his flack decided the subject matter was too controversial. Right, like presidential nominees should avoid discussing anything controversial! If they did all they'd end up doing at debates was drinking Yoohoos! Although not attributed anywhere, the post on IMDB claims McCain also bailed after learning there is no hard evidence linking vaccines with thimerosal and autism. Either way, McCain declined to meet with the former Playboy centerfold (huge mistake, dude!) and McCarthy has now set her sites on meeting with Senator Obama.

How old is too old for trick or treating on Halloween?

My father, who's birthday is on Halloween (lucky guy!) would tell you that you're really never too old to celebrate Halloween. His love for the holiday is probably the reason Halloween is my favorite day of the year. That said, we've all opened our doors to hand out candy to someone who was, in our opinion, a little too old to be hitting up the neighbors for candy. Costumes are one thing--having seen the magic and creativity of many a Halloween parade (including the likes of the famous ones in New Orleans and New York City), I can attest that you're never too old to wear a costume, parade around and have a general good time. Once you hit a certain age, the candy is generally replaced by cocktails at such functions, but what about that in between time?

I've heard people say they've turned away kids who they thought were too old for trick or treating. I've also heard people say that it's the parents' responsibility to not only take the kids trick or treating but to tell them at what age to stop. I remember dressing up and hitting the neighborhood myself when I was in middle school and getting the hairy eyeball from a parent or too. My friend, who went as a baby, actually got on her knees after pushing the doorbell and wore pigtails to appear younger. I realized at that point, once you spend any period of time thinking about how to appear younger, you need to be on the other side of the candy bowl.

What do you think? Is it more important for the parents to tell the kid when to stop trick or treating, or should it be a decision the child makes on her own? Isn't Halloween really all about rebellion, anyway? If so, then telling a child he can't go trick or treating might just get him more inclined to do so without your blessing!

Rebecca Romijn's twins most likely will be early

Rebecca Romijn

Here's a newsflash--a celebrity who will have her child, or in this case, children, early! Most celebrities never make it through the ninth month or pregnancy, opting for c-sections at the eighth month in order to avoid getting ginormous during the final weeks of pregnancy. Too late, Rebecca!

Those carrying twins--celebrity or not--are more likely to give birth earlier anyway. Rebecca Romijn is both a celebrity and carrying twins, so she is expected to pop--or have her babies--sooner rather than later. She is allegedly being placed on bed rest starting in October in hopes of getting the twins she's expecting with super-lucky husband Jerry O'Connell in January through some time in December.

Romijn joins countless celebrities in recent months who've either gotten pregnant with or given birth to twins. Her husband Jerry recently commented that she was "huge" and then later apologized. Perhaps the baby hormones are affecting him too! Good luck, Rebecca! Here's to hoping you make it to the new year! I can't imagine a woman on the go like her having to deal with bed rest!!! That'll be harder than surgery!

Average SAHM has 94.4-hour work week

laundry basketAn annual survey by Salary.com revealed that the average stay-at-home mom works an average of 94.4 hours per week, meaning that in the context of a normal 40-hour week, more than half of her time on the job is overtime.

The survey, administered yearly since 2000, also determined that in 2008, a full-time mother's annal salary would come in at $116,805, down from 2007's figure of $138,094. And just what does a family get in return for this princely sum?

Salary.com breaks a mother's job down into the following duties: housekeeper, day-care center teacher, cook, laundry machine operator, computer operator, psychologist, facilities manager, van driver, and chief executive officer.

So let me get that straight -- I am working in excess of 90 hours a week, and my salary has decreased? What gives?

The company uses a number of factors to calculate mom's paycheck, and this year added a new wrinkle: companies with fewer than 25 employees tend to offer lower salaries. Your typical American family comes in way under that "25 or more" threshold. If you think the SAHM's salary is miserly, consider this -- a working mom's job description is roughly equal to that of one who stays at home, and she only nets $68,405 for her 54.6 "mom work week."

Want to know exactly how much you're worth? You and your family can calculate your personal compensation at mom.salary.com.

Does exercise help pregnant women stop smoking?

One would think the obvious answer to that question is yes. One would surmise that exercise would help anyone stop smoking, right? After all, you're striving to do something healthy, sort of the opposite of smoking, by getting out there and running or doing yoga or whatever it is, not to mention that raising your heart rate and panting and whatnot is a little easier when you have full use of your lungs. Only problem is, smoking is touted as nearly impossible to quit--it's just that addictive.

We've been told for years and years now how bad it is for pregnant women to smoke. Children of pregnant women run the risk of a number of problems including low birth weight, asthma and increased risk of infant mortality. According to researchers, seventeen percent of British women and twenty percent of American women profess to smoke during pregnancy. Exercise is seen as a great way to assist in the cessation of the notoriously hard to kick habit and is considered a much safer option than nicotine patches, which are seen as possibly harmful to the unborn child.

In a study recently conducted in Britain, women were asked to exercise and given weekly smoking cessation counseling. Twenty-five percent of the 32 women tested were able to give up smoking before they gave birth. It has been suggested that the physical activity alleviated cravings. A new study by the same researchers will focus on a group of 850 women in an effort to uncover more data.

Does having it all make Sarah Palin more like us?

Red Mom Blue Mom

Welcome to Red Mom Blue Mom, ParentDish's special coverage of the 2008 Presidential election. Each Tuesday through November 4, columnists Rachel Campos-Duffy (Red Mom) and Ada Calhoun (Blue Mom) will take on issues relevant to parents on both sides of the aisle. You can find past Red Mom/Blue Mom posts here.


Blue Mom: Sarah Palin -- She's not like us
By Ada Calhoun


Sarah PalinThe good news is we're popular. Women who are balancing career and family and worried about the tanking economy are this year's "security moms." Time magazine is calling us "Maxed-Out Moms" and saying we'll be deciding the election. Go, us!

The bad news is John McCain thinks he can woo us with a "Type A, antiabortion, Christian Stepford wife in a 'sexy librarian' costume," in the words of Salon.com's Cintra Wilson. Sarah Palin is George Bush in pumps. She thinks creationism should be taught alongside evolution and that raped women should be denied abortions (and pay for their own rape kits).

The worse news: McCain's cynical bid for our attention has been working. And rather than focusing on Palin's political incompetence, we've been distracted by condescending questions you would never see if she were a man (and that are 100% projections of our own tough choices), like this one from Reuters:

"Should a 44-year-old mother of five, including a newborn with special needs and a pregnant teenager, take on a job that will keep her away from her home for much of the next two months to eight years?" The New York Times called these discussions "Mommy Wars: Special Campaign Edition."

It's a ridiculous conversation to even entertain. The truth is, we have far more in common with Barack and Michelle, who only recently paid off their student loan debt, than with Todd and Sarah, whose high-paying jobs allow them what appears to be infinite vacation time in which to gut moose and shoot wolves from planes . (Jobs that are low-paying in the rest of the U.S. are highly paid in Alaska.) Alaska might as well be Scandinavia for as much as it has in common with the hard reality of trying to support a family in America today.

Let's stop worrying about her family. She can afford babysitting and sick days. Thanks to what Slate describes as "Alaska's large negative income tax (and outsize share of federal pork)," the Palins are living it up on two six-figure incomes.

Sarah Palin has it all, in the traditional sense: the hunky husband, the passel of kids, the high-power job, the financial security, the silk Valentino jackets. She's Diane Keaton in Baby Boom meets Melanie Griffith in Working Girl. Her family is living the dream.

But what about our families? Sarah Palin may be like us in certain ways. Most of us acquired our foreign policy expertise from sixth-grade global studies, for example. But judging by her right-of-Bush positions on the issues, she doesn't appear to have any intention of sharing the wealth. Every plank of the McCain-Palin platform shows that she's far from one of the girls.



Red Mom: Along comes Sarah
By Rachel Campos-Duffy


Sarah PalinDuring one of the funnier moments in the Democrat primary, Barack Obama mocked Hillary's attempt to bond with Pennsylvania voters with childhood stories about hunting with her grandfather: "She's talking like she's Annie Oakley!" Obama laughed. Who could have predicted that five short months later an authentic Alaskan Annie Oakley, with pioneer-woman skills, down-home values, and sexy eyewear would shake up the race and our notions of successful motherhood.

On the left and right, much of the fascination with Sarah Palin has to do with her having seemingly accomplished the elusive female trifecta: big career, great marriage, and a brood of five kids ranging from 18 years of age to 4 months. Did I mention that she was able to hide her latest pregnancy well into her sixth month, thanks to tight abs? Just as women were giving up on being super-mom, and well-educated Gen Xers began dropping out of the work force to explore a more balanced approach to work and family ("I can have it all, just not all at the same time"), along comes Sarah. She's the successful governor of America's largest and most macho state, yet she's the most unabashed and overtly maternal politician our nation has ever seen.

How does she do it? Does she really have it all? Yes, she does have it all, but this type of high-level multi-tasking is never simple and the results are always complicated and sometimes messy, as the tabloids and her critics ceaselessly remind us.

But while her over-achiever approach to career and fertility may not be for you (as a fellow mother of five, I get exhausted just thinking about it), there is still plenty to learn and admire from how well she has managed to put it all together. The first and most important part of her success is a supportive husband. She has also chosen to live close to her extended family and believes teenagers need to pull their weight in the family (amen to that one!). Following the birth of her son Trig, Todd, not a nanny, came with her to the office to help out. As the mayor and then governor, Sarah keeps a baby swing and crib at the office and she has been known to nurse discreetly during meetings.

Not every woman is blessed with these options, but when a woman who can DOES, it says something about her priorities. Besides, with an 80% approval rating, the highest of any U.S. governor, who can credibly say she is neglecting her professional duties?

What impresses me most about Sarah Palin is the fact that she stood by her pro-life values when she found out that only one year into first term as governor she was pregnant with a Downs Syndrome baby. It was an unplanned pregnancy and she knew that that following through with it would raise serious questions about her ability to perform as governor and expose her to harsh and hurtful criticisms about her mothering. While other women may have chosen an easier road, she did not. Instead of compromising her principles for the sake of convenience or political expediency, she found creative and cooperative ways to make it work. Not a bad credential for a future VP!

Does having it all make Sarah Palin more like you?

DailyDish - Don't listen to advice

When it comes to parenting, don't feel the need to follow or even listen to everyone else's advice.

Continue reading DailyDish - Don't listen to advice

Is homeschooling right for your family?

I read an article on babble from a mother who decided, along with her husband, to not send her child to kindergarten this fall. Instead the couple are planning on home-schooling their son, along with a group of other New York City-based parents with the same idea. Upon initial read of the article, I didn't really get much of a takeaway. In fact, it seemed like homeschooling better suited the lifestyles of the parents than serving as a decision based on the child's needs. That said, it seems like parents know their children better than anyone else, and therefore should know what method of learning is best suited for their kids. The author had her reasons for doing what she did--or, rather, not doing what she would have--and she should be given cred for making such a decision.

Some of the other parents in the homeschooling group felt that the schools were too focused on testing and not really teaching kids what they needed to know, etc. Standardized testing really has taken hold of our community, and both parents and teachers have felt the uncomfortable crunch. Parents are starting to feel their children aren't being taught how to learn anymore, just what to learn. I can see a real argument for homeschooling.

But, is that the right reason to pull a kid out of school? Is any reason good enough? Or, to the contrary, do the schools need to start proving to us they can offer more than what we as parents can do for our children? If schools aren't listening to the needs of parents and children then what is the point? I personally don't know enough about proper education and the education system to be able to make a decision as hard as keeping my child out of school. Others seem to have it all worked out, down to ordering specific, home-based curriculum to teach their kids themselves. Some prefer to let the child learn more freestyle, and eschew more traditional methods. I'll tell you right now the last thing my kid needs is for me to be his main teacher! It's terrifying to me to even begin to think about everything I think he ought to know, and then how I would get all that knowledge to him. He'd be better off learning from our weiner dog!

So who's right? Do parents know enough to be able to make decisions like homeschooling for their kids? Does the education system really serve our needs and is it really preparing our children for the future? I think the answer probably lies somewhere outside both those things, but only time will tell.

High fructose corn syrup ads target moms

"Wowwww. You don't care what the kids eat, huh?" So says one mom to another at a children's birthday party. Harsh. That's the first thing wrong with the most recent ad from SweetSurprise.com, a website put out by the Corn Refiners Association to ease parents minds about the dangers of high fructose corn syrup.

In response to growing concern over the link between high fructose corn syrup and childhood obesity, parents are turning away from products aimed at kids that include the ingredient. This isn't sitting well with the Corn Refiners Association, who are fighting back with an ad campaign meant to make HFCS look as sweet as innocent as your little dumpling who's drinking it or eating it. But are they telling the truth?

The key here, I think, is in the ad's own words "fine in moderation." That may be a truth, yes, but HFCS is in an alarming number of processed food products marketed to children, including yogurts, cereals, crackers, chips, fruit snacks, and breakfast bars. Moderation, when it comes to HFCS, is hard to achieve unless you're actively aware of avoiding it. The CRA's other argument is that, because HFCS is made from corn, it's "all-natural." But what they have to do to the corn to refine it into syrup is not, making that a questionable claim at best.

The most worrisome thing to me, however, is that we're seeing this kind of political ad... for FOOD. That should set off alarm bells right there. Yes, I'll let my kids drink a glass of punch full of the stuff at their next birthday party. But if the CRA really believes their own "in moderation" line, then they should be reducing HFCS in children's food products. Not staging a mommy war next to the cupcakes.

Watch the ad below and tell us what you think.


Chicken pox vaccine cuts cases by up to 90%

child with chicken poxParents opting out of the chicken pox vaccine in hopes that their child will catch it naturally might find that a difficult thing to accomplish. Since the vaccine was introduced in 1995, chicken pox cases have fallen 57 to 90 percent. Before 1995, says USA Today, 4 million people developed the disease, 11,000 were hospitalized, and 140 died. Today, those numbers are reduced dramatically, and even infections in unvaccinated children under the age of 1 have dropped significantly.

What is still unknown about the chicken pox vaccine, however, is how long immunity lasts. Before the vaccine, children and adults were exposed to the virus naturally again and again, building immunity. So children may need booster shots when they enter middle school or high school, or even again as adults. Experts are also unclear how the chicken pox vaccine will affect a person's risk of developing shingles -- a condition caused by the dormant chicken pox virus -- when they are older.

My girls have been in playgroups and social activities since they were babies, and -- to my knowledge -- they've never been exposed to chicken pox. Though my kids are vaccinated, some parents go as far as to hold "pox parties" to expose their kids to the vaccine naturally. But with numbers falling as they are, finding a wild case of chicken pox might become a rare thing indeed.

Did you vaccinate for chickenpox? Or did you try to expose your child to the bug naturally?

59-year-old French woman gives birth to triplets


(Think that's shocking? Click the photo to see who set the record for identical births!)

A fifty-nine-year-old French woman has given birth to triplets after seeking fertility treatment. The new mom, unnamed at press time, sought fertility treatment in Vietnam after she was denied assistance in her home country.

In France, it is illegal for medical practitioners to provide fertility treatment when to women who are considered past the age of being able to procreate naturally. As a result, the pregnancy, once it became known, drew harsh criticism. from many in the French community. In other parts of the world, however, women are having children at ages much higher than fifty nine.

The woman gave birth to two sons and a daughter via C-section last Saturday. Mom, boys and girl are reportedly in good condition. In the United States women are free to seek fertility treatment whenever they want, as far as I understand. It certainly isn't illegal to provide such treatment, although some would say it is unethical.

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Should US law bar older women from fertility treatments?



Todd Palin - A feminist icon?

Rachel Campos Duffy

Todd Palin is the untold story of this election. He is a blue-collar snowmobiling fisherman who is secure enough in his masculinity to hold babies and host teas for the former first ladies of Alaska.

During Hillary's campaign, Bill Clinton couldn't help upstaging her and his narcissistic rantings cost her dearly in a razor thin primary. On the other hand, the "First Dude" of the most macho state in our union coolly stands in the background supporting his successful wife without a trace of resentment or envy.

Maybe that's evolution for you. Boomer husbands talk the talk, but Gen X hubbies walk the walk.

I'm an at-home mom of five who writes a weekly column and is also working on a book. There is no way I could do it all without a teammate. As I write this post at my kitchen table, my husband is cleaning the kitchen. As it happens, I'm married to a cute Midwestern lumberjack D.A. who is as comfortable doing the dishes with a baby strapped to his chest in a Bjorn as he is wielding an axe or questioning a witness on the stand. Now that's what I call progress!

Sarah and Todd's relationship is the embodiment of the "partnership" feminists have been calling for for decades. That's why I cannot understand why feminist icons like Gloria Steinem could not put aside their politics on abortion to celebrate, if not this historic nomination, then this exemplary partnership -- a partnership far more liberated than the strange and unrelatable Clinton marriage. I guess for Steinem, if you're pro-life and pro-gun, it just doesn't count.

When it comes to equality and respect between the sexes, the Palins have pushed the ball further in one week than the Clintons have in a decade in the national spotlight. In fact, the tacky and humiliating Monica Lewinski scandal probably set us back.

As for Oprah, well this whole debate could be resolved by simply inviting Todd to the show. Who better to speak about the conditions necessary for female advancement and fulfillment? Come on Oprah, forget Tom Cruise. Put the hunky, helpful husband on your couch!

Angelina Jolie suffering from post-partum depression?

Angelina JolieI'm not at all inclined to believe any of the flotsam floating around out there about the state of Angelina Jolie's twins' health. I am inclined to believe, however, the bits about Angelina suffering from post partum depression (PPD). Ange is a mom just like the rest of us, and, like most new moms, she is probably experiencing it on some level.

According to reports, Angie is in a tither over the health of twins Vivienne Marcheline and Knox Leon and is depressed. She is crying throughout the day and exhausted from sleepless nights. Well, welcome to early motherhood! Birth is a big deal, however you do it. Between the act of giving birth and all the pregnancy hormones flowing in and out of your body, crying is probably the least of it. Some women get PPD so badly they impart harm to themselves, their spouses and their children. Ange will be lucky if she gets away with just crying.

Having been through a milder form of PPD myself, I can say that sometimes the crying seems as if it will never end. The sadness seems insurmountable and the lack of control overwhelming. But, hope is around the corner--women and their doctors are more aware of PPD and how to treat it. Even superwomen/supermoms like Angelina Jolie are not immune to PPD or other post-natal symptoms. Let's hope that's all it is, and that she is able to get the help and understand--and support, especially from Brad--she needs in order to get better!

Posh Spice cooks for her family!

Ok, who knows if this is really true, but it's certainly cute. According to Victoria Beckham herself, she cooks for her family. Many moms accomplish this task, but I'd wager few are as busy as Posh Spice, who spends her time running her fashion lines of jeans and clothes as well as modeling and being a fashion plate in general. Posh also recently released yet another fragrance she's been promoting.

Posh, who is vegetarian (perhaps that is how she keeps her trim figure?) says she makes a good mincemeat pie though. Posh also says she cooks dinner every Sunday for her family, which consists of husband David--international soccer star and megahottie--and three sons, Romeo, Cruz and Brooklyn. The menu includes Yorkshire pudding and Dora the Explorer cakes--I'm guessing those are David's favorite???

Victoria was under recent speculation that she might be adding to her family but has done her best to quell those rumors by wearing tight fitting clothes and telling everyone she is too busy to consider another child at this time. Part of the reason she is so busy is spending some time suing magazines for claiming she takes dieting pills. Maybe she just doesn't like mincemeat pies!

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